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realm of the muse

[realmof_themuse] 2009.23.3.A - Hunt
2009.23.3.A - Hunt

So, for those of you who follow my blog and my exploits, you'll recall that I used to get in the old school spirit by playing "Top 25 Party Schools Bingo". Well, as much fun as that was (and still is, because if there is one thing that will never go out of style, it is college women's overriding need to behave as badly as possible), I've decided to create a new game, one that I think even the most novice of bros can participate in.

NOOKIE BINGO

So, let's start with your game card. Click to embiggen (heh) and see the full-size, printable version.



As you can see, the field is divided in standard bingo format, five by five, with a "free space" in the center. The contents of the squares are divided into four major categories: cliché female archetypes, locations, props and beejers (because face it fellas, don't beejers deserve a category all their own?), distributed more or less randomly.

The rules of the game can vary, depending on your circumstances and your level of expertise at landing chicks.

You may either play 1) for points, which will be tallied at my website with both regional and national leader boards, or 2) for money, in the case of having two or more dudes engaged in a friendly competition.

As for how the card is utilized, here are the variations on play:

Level I: For the beginner in bro-dom.

In Level I play, a guy may mark off one square each time he experiences a sexual encounter involving the item stated. A "bingo" is achieved by marking off at least one square in each column or one in each row.

Level II: For the intermediate bro.

In Level II play, squares may also be marked off one at a time, but a "bingo" is only achieved when five squares in one row, column or diagonal are marked off.

Bonus points or monies are awarded when the winning "bingo" does not utilize the free space.

Level III: For the advanced bro.

In Level III play, the object of the game is a complete "blackout" of the card. Squares may only be marked off when one (1) sexual encounter involves all five (5) items (or four (4) items and the free space).

Enjoy yourselves, boys. But let's be careful out there.

You know-- no uggos.


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